Calm after the Chaos!

   I have been really fortunate the last 3 years to have my kids go to school next door to each other.  While that is great, the traffic, well, it sucks!  I'll say that the most stress in my life has been during Pick up and Drop off at their schools.  There have been times that I could lose my testimony there, and I think I've said "moron" a few too many times!   I swear, people lose their minds and forget simple things like what to do at a 4 way stop!!  It's CRAZY!!!!

   As crazy as that time is, I love the calm in my house when we get home from school.  My kids love their rooms and honestly, I think they need the time to unplug.  They need solitude after being with 500+ kids all day.  I've worked in both of their schools, and if you remember your own school experience...it's LOUD in there!!! 

   I don't blame them a bit.  They both get a snack, hug on me for a bit (or sit next to me while I write this ) and then head to their rooms.  It's quiet. It's peaceful. It's good for their souls.

   Or maybe, they are dying to play on their phones, watch Netflix or play video games.  Either way, the quiet is nice! :)

This is not going to be a popular post

Spoiler Alert:  This is not going to be a popular blog post....

Yesterday was Christmas, so that means that New Year's is next week.  Along with that day come New Year Resolutions. I can say honestly, that I have NEVER kept a resolution I made.  I didn't lose 30 pounds, run a half marathon, read my Bible all the way thru or bring world peace. Usually by February, I've already stopped doing what I said I was going to accomplish in the new year, and feel like a loser.  Anyone with me??!??!!!????

If you know me, you know that I love Facebook and Instagram...honestly I do.  But, in the last few months, I've found myself hiding or defriending/unfollowing people that I'm friends with, simply because they make me feel guilty.  Guilty that I'm not eating "clean", working out every day, following Dave Ramsey's plan, losing 3 dress sizes, reading TONS of mommy books, doing Bible study after Bible study, etc....

Am I happy for those people???  YES!!!  I'm happy that they've made that commitment to do those things, but I've come to realize that seeing that all the time doesn't make me want to do it too. It makes me feel like a loser because I'm not.  I've realized that I'm a MUCH nicer mommy when I DON'T get up at 5am to work out! It's amazing what that extra hour of sleep can do for me!! But hey, if you want to, and it works for you, by all means, do it!  

Maybe it's because I'm older, more cynical maybe, I don't know.  All I know is that I don't want/need a FB or Instagram friend to make me feel guilty.  I have 2 kids and that creates enough guilt anyway....am I screwing them up?  Am I making the right decisions in how we're raising them?  Should I get a job so that I can help with our finances?  I could go on and on....but my point is, I'm taking control of what I'm seeing, and what is making me feel better or worse about myself! :)

 All I know is that today was a pretty perfect day.... a lazy day on the couch, still in my pjs at 2pm, cuddling with my kiddos and hubby, eating cookies!!  I mean, what doesn't sound good about that!!????!! (and no, my cookies aren't "clean") But hey, that's just me....now, maybe that's a resolution I can keep!